Time to confess

BeeDance, did you stick your head in the oven to check the temperature? (Is that why your avatar looks like that?)

 

That's me AFTER coffee, a shave, and a wonderful night's rest (OK, yes they DID apply a bit of makeup and airbrushed a little). I suspect you didn't want to see me when I was still sitting up waiting for a teenage daughter to get home really, really, really late from a date (OK, it was almost 5 minutes but it felt like weeks! Dads can become nervous wrecks when their little girls are with boys!

And in case you weren't sure, YES I do my own stunts.

This week’s Farmer’s Anonymous meeting:

We are very sorry to begin with some very sad news: Clancy-Joe-Bob passed away over the weekend in a freak accident when he was run over by a harvester. The doctors said they felt they could have saved him if only he had gotten to the emergency room before the machine had backed up to see what they hit the fourth time. It is a reminder to all of us to be very careful about backing up accidentally multiple times as this can sometimes cause undue stress on the transmission.
As many of you know, Clancy-Joe-Bob was Bubba’s inner child’s Chihuahua’s groomer’s 3rd cousin on her mother’s side’s bridesmaid’s uncle’s 4th wife/2nd cousin’s mother’s 2nd husband. This passing has of course hit Bubba very hard; he is having a lot of difficulty dealing with the loss of yet another one of the voices in his head. Since Bubba is the FA secretary, the minutes are in total disarray (editor's note: yeah like that's something new!) Bubba is still out of town for the funeral, but most of his imaginary friends are not local. The FA office is in such a mess no one can find anything, so when Bubba gets back the fan is going to hit the proverbial you-know-what.

This week several things happened on people’s farms that brought them to the meeting in droves. First, several found their caterpillars were emerging from cocoons and flying for the first time. This is causing much concern for many since they are flying without a butterfly net.

The meeting began about like it usually does, but once the rounds from the stun guns and tasers were exhausted at least some of the first row was quieter. The guest speaker did not show up. No one seemed in the least bit surprised or disappointed for that matter, so the meeting was an open forum which as usual turned into a free for all. People broke into two groups almost immediately, those for and those against. No one knows what the “for” or “against” sides were for or against - like that ever matters. Soon gophers were popping out of the floors, walls, ceilings, punch bowls, and whatever else was available and exploding. A few seconds later the exploded sites were as good as new. Discussions began as to whether they were cute enough to smash with cartoon mallets. Others wanted to know about breeding requirements and how many golden bananas could be gotten. Before anything could be decided bunnies started coming out of the woodwork. Needless to say no one made any progress in breaking their addiction, and in fact several farmers are even worse because of the meeting. So as you can see the meeting was typical of our success rate.

Everyone wants to send a special thank you to the refreshment committee for the special Easter Egg Ice Cream. Some members however think next year it should be made with Chocolate eggs rather than hard boiled ones. Others felt perhaps the eggs just needed the shells peeled first. In the end the steering committee felt the best solution was to remove the suggestion box. The re-fried jelly bean tacos turned out to be better than almost anyone expected. I don’t know of anyone actually eating one but they had wonderful aerodynamic characteristics and made a nice splat sound when they hit. Sadly no gophers were successfully whacked. The recipe is on the official FA website as are the engineering test results for aerial variances due to wind speed and barometric pressures, so be sure to download that vital information for your night time reading enjoyment.

Don’t forget the semi-annual Christmas bake sale and sled dog bike race is coming up very soon. Also we need more volunteers to help with this activity. The requirements to volunteer have been relaxed somewhat, so even if you are heavily medicated due to farming addictions, or your parole officer has not yet had you re-arrested for violations of possession of gardening tools while on probation, then come on out and join the fun! Remember handbags and backpacks WILL be searched to be sure no one is carrying concealed tillers or tractors… we want this to be an addiction-free event for all the kiddies and farmers alike! Hope to see you all there as well as the next FA meeting!

 

BeeDance, If you send some of your members to the Chocoholics (not so) Anonymous meeting on the night of the full moon, we will happily supply them with Chocolate eggs for your Easter Egg Ice Cream.

 

When chocolate is involved I will go in their stead. I'll take one for the team!

 

...Love this thread!!!

 

Okay, it's official. I'm completely addicted after less than a month. At 5:50 a.m., I rolled over and thought "if I get up and go harvest my MM crops, I can plant one more time before the event ends at 7 a.m." So I did. I'm nuts. I just know it.

 

sewinglady - Welcome to the club!!!

 

How's about this then-yesterday was MM....I was after 2 decorations to go on my new unthemed Cloud Row but I also wanted a Spider Hut and to try and have enough to make 1 or 2 Terror Bouquets so what did I do?
Stayed up til stupid o'clock on the PC then slept on the sofa with the game still on....set alarms to get up in the night and very early this morning to harvest.

I got my 2 deco's and my Spider Hut and a few extra MM crops to boot!!!

Do you think that classifies me as being a Farmerama addict??

Hey Bee, when's the next meeting again?

 

I have not started setting any alarms for getting up in the middle of the night yet. But I have gotten up a bit early a few times to farm before RL kicks in around here.

 

See... the thing is labmommy, my RL isn't what you'd call very 'full' or 'busy' atm....this will change but for now I'm just enjoying being on the farm, chillin' with my farmer pals until RL responsibilities take over again! So that's how I justify doing mental things like staying up half the night and getting up through the night to harvest my pretend crops on my pretend farm without being carted off to wear a long sleeved coat or be disowned by my family... (they don't actually know I go to these lengths to get enough MM crops because:

1, they'd wonder what on earth is Moonlight Mania when it's at home?? (They'd think it was another one of my 'hippy'/alternative interests!!

and

2, I don't think they'd understand why getting enough 'Abominable Plants' or 'Googly Eyed Bushes' was paramount to making a Bouquet called Terror or making a Large Sludge Pond....!!!!!!!!!!

 

I only have to get up in the morning to drive to the school for drop-off. The rest of the day is all mine. I am on the farm the majority of the day and late into the night, but once I go to bed that's where I'll be until it's time to get up. I tried once to set an alarm for a gravest when I was cutting and event down to the wire! I slept right through it!

 

To what lengths do you go to feed your obsession? I got the airdesk, So I can just swing the laptop out of my way, due to other interests I know to time house stuff to clicking at times, ie: ironing shirts xx amount of time so fit in chick feeding or harvest well not be an issue lol.

How much of your RL is scheduled around harvest times? RL for me is the computer or crochet so adding farming is easy.

Do you sometimes pretend to look busy at work even though you're really looking for great market deals? Never. I just close the laptop lid and get back on the work desktop one. what they don't see will not hurt me.

How many times have you fibbed to friends or family and told you couldn't meet up because you had an appointment when the latest event was about to start? I am not up to doing an event yet so have time to "set" longer pattern time up I need to be alone when making patterns for crochet

Do you keep telling yourself 'just one more, this will be the last one' for every new baby farm you add to your imperium although you really know better? Only then? heck I am doing that now!

Do you count rabbits bouncing on trampolines to go to sleep? Eyes to blurry and heavy to think anything. No idea why.....

 

Sounds like you need some garden therapy!

My son (then about 2) fixed my sewing habit early... he stole the bobbin and cover . Turns out the parts are about as expensive as a new machine.

I have pretty much co-opted the "kid's" computer... they do get it for homework, though.

(actually, my current schedule has me home during the day, so I spend time with them for a bit, then head off to work. They get to have the computer after I leave until their bedtimes, so its not THAT bad .. and so I keep telling myself..lol)

 

Personally I'm not seeing the addiction in this situation; looks like normal playing mode to me. Sending our new spouse ahead on the honeymoon is a maybe (but that's a BIG stretch), not getting out of a burning building could go either way. Failing to make it to your own funeral because you have crops to harvest I think counts as addiction, but not absolutely positive about that one....

 

This week’s Farmer’s Anonymous meeting:
Finally! We had a quiet almost uneventful meeting this week… Well until Bubba showed up. Many spoke words of condolence to him for the loss of his inner child’s imaginary friend’s long distanced person’s death. I almost spoke to him – until I saw his shirt that said, “My inner child’s friend died and all I got was this lousy T-shirt”. Bubba’s not the sharpest light in the golf bag.

After the discussion about breaking addictions to farming games, which by the way did not require the use of every bandage in the second-hand first aid kit (for the first time in recorded history), a member suggested we adopt the unofficial FA song as the Official FA song. Since some did not know what song she was referring to she attempted to sing it. I say sing, but I give the widest possible latitude to the definition of the word “sing”. I don’t mean to judge, but honestly I believe a goosed eagle would have sounded better… by a long shot.

Since the weather has warmed up, refreshments were served outdoors. Tiki torches lit the perimeter but several farmers still managed to slip through the containment fence and land mines. Though they denied harvesting, they ALL had dirt under their fingernails and the definite smell of fertilizer when they were seen a little later near the punch bowl. One tried to tell us it was her perfume but no one believed “Ode of Cow Barn” was really on sale at Walmart (2 CCs per gallon). Several other farmers left to make a “reconnaissance” to put the matter to rest, but also came back with dirt encrusted fingernails and bunny eggs they “found” wandering along the road. Said eggs soon exploded into EPs and the recon results went right out the window as members fought over ownership of the EPs. For the other two of us not involved in the "negotiations", the refreshments were pretty good. We were able to choose through the offered foods and managed to find a couple items that did not have flies swarming around them. The chocolate-filled bowl was delicious but really needed a ladle for dipping; eating it in the only manner that seemed available brought on serious De-Ja-Vu that was intensified when the “escort service” once again showed up. We thought towels had been provided this time, but it turned out several ladies who were also into quilting & sewing had brought antique white quilted wedding dresses to show other ladies interested in such things. I am sorry to report Dark chocolate stains antique white quilted wedding dresses, though personally I think you would have to look closely to notice.

Katherine-Joanne-Marie-Cherie’s miniature prize kitty had her litter. Anyone (except Bubba… she was VERY specific about this) interested in “adopting” a kitty in a couple months when they are weaned should let her know. The only details I was able to get before being seen to my tractor was the daddy kitty was a show cat (i.e. he showed up one night, gone by morning), (BTW – his serenading all night still sounded better than the singing of the possible FA song), and he seems to be on the endangered species list of large extinct cats. Please hurry to get your little bundle of joy (terror?) reserved as soon as possible. She assures us the fangs will grow to full 12” length by the time they are 6 months old.

Next weekend is the first of this year’s three long-anticipated (dreaded?) semiannual Christmas Bake Sales and Sled Dog Bike Race. We can still use a couple more volunteers. Not to give away all the special sites and sounds but no expense was spared and they have brought in extra side shows for everyone’s enjoyment. Be sure to mark your calendar as I’m sure you don’t want to miss The Bearded Man, The One-headed Snake, The world’s tallest midget (at an amazing 5’8”!!! – Sorry I don’t know how many milliliters that is; a sad commentary on American public education), and other strange and astounding sites.

Until next meeting, farm responsibly!

 

a member suggested we adopt the unofficial FA song as the Official FA song. Since some did not know what song she was referring to she attempted to sing it. I say sing, but I give the widest possible latitude to the definition of the word “sing”. I don’t mean to judge, but honestly I believe a goosed eagle would have sounded better… by a long shot.

I apologize for my lack of singing ability and I swear I will never attempt to sing the FA song ever again.

 

Oh, I want a saber tooth kitty! Me, me, me, please? Pretty please?

(BTW: The FCnsA will be happy to provide you with all the ladles we confiscated last meeting for your chocolate scooping needs. Sorry, but we are keeping the towels, we anticipate a great need for them next meeting.)

 

You know I would take one of those saber tooth kitties in a heartbeat!

I'm pretty sure since I recently synchronized my watch to the in game timer and set an alarm that would go off 15 min prior to harvest time that I'm going to be attending the next meeting.

 

Welcome to the group Clash!